SO MANY EMOTIONS
It has been almost a week since mum has been in hospital. It is very quiet, which is strange.
Apparently she is good as gold in the hospital and sharing her goodies.....she can be so good when she wants to hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
I try to speak to her on her phone, but I have to ask the question who am I doing that for? Me or mum? She thinks we have abandoned her...because of Covid we cannot see her. Because of the confusion when I call she pleads with me to come and get her or this evening to call the doctor to convince them to let her home. It is so sad to hear her beg me and make me promise when I know I do not have that power. I realise she must be so scared not knowing anyone around her and she believes she is far too young to be on the ward she is. Does speaking to her upset her more? I do not want her to think she is forgotten!!!!! It is such a tough call.
I know she needs to be there until all is sorted....but I also want her home in a surrounding that makes her feel safe and loved.
When people say this is a cruel disease....that does not even cover it....its devastating, heart breaking.
Love you Mother